Ex-Boyfriend Spying on Me

Why your ex-boyfriend is spying on you

Your ex-boyfriend might be spying on you because they still have feelings, are jealous, or want to maintain control over you—even outside a relationship. It could also be that they don’t want to lose contact and are curious about your new life. Other reasons include:

• Insecurity and possessiveness
• Revenge
• Manipulation
• Closure (the unhealthy kind)
• Checking out your new partner

No matter the reason, spying on you is a no-no (apart from the fact that it is illegal) and should be discouraged.

How can your ex-boyfriend spy on you?

The most concerning spying method is spyware apps installed on your device before or after your breakup. Usually, ex-partners install these malicious programs on your phone without your knowledge. And how does spyware work? Spyware apps give them access to a range of personal information about you.

What information can they access?

• Texts, calls, and emails
• Your location
• Browsing history and social media
• Photos and videos
• Home smart system
• Home alarm system
• Account passwords

Spyware apps are often legitimate applications marketed to concerned parents who want to know where their kids are. This makes it difficult to detect them. But, not impossible.

The spyware apps list is long, but they usually include the following:

• Eyezy
• mSpy
• uMobix
• ClevGuard
• Webwatcher
• Flexispy
• Highster

Signs your ex-boyfriend is spying on you

If your ex-boyfriend is spying on you, you might notice they know intimate details about your life or appear in places you’ve never shared with them. You may also spot unusual activity on your devices. If you're wondering how to know if your ex is spying on your Mac or Android, just look for signs like system slowdowns, rearranged files, or location services turning on unexpectedly.

Other signs your ex is spying on you include:

• Messages are marked as read before you open them
• You’re receiving odd, spammy messages or emails
• Photos and videos delete themselves
• Your files keep rearranging themselves on your device
• Your device or system’s performance has slowed down
• Your location services are activated unexpectedly
• Strange noises during calls
• Devices overheat when not in use
• Unexplained phone bills.

These could all be clues that they’re monitoring you physically and/or with a spyware app. For instance, battery drain, overheating, and device “glitches” are signs of spyware installation.

What to do if your ex-boyfriend is spying on you

If you're wondering how to stop spying on your phone, start by searching your devices for spyware using an anti-spy app, changing all your passwords, and reviewing permissions and shared accounts. But that’s not all.

Here are some other steps you can take to protect yourself from a spying ex boyfriend:

1. Change all passwords

The first step to protecting yourself is to reset all—yes, all—your passwords. Start with email, social media, banking apps, and any personal or shared accounts—like your Apple ID and Google account. Be sure to choose unique passwords across each site.

2. Manage shared or family accounts

If you’ve previously shared access to any family or joint accounts, it’s important to review and update them. Start by checking your shared accounts and closing the ones you don’t need anymore. You can always open a separate one later.

And if you absolutely have to keep that account, change your login details. This goes for accounts like streaming services (like Netflix or Spotify), shared cloud storage (Google Drive or iCloud), or even family phone plans (Verizon or AT&T).

After that, remove your ex-boyfriend's access immediately.

3. Check your devices

Next, take a good look at your devices for any signs that something’s off. Check your phone, tablet, or computer for files you don’t recognize or settings you didn’t change. Slow performance or quick battery drain could mean there’s spyware somewhere. Learning how to find hidden spy apps on Android is key because some of these apps hide so well, that you might not even realize they’re there.

How to detect and remove spyware if your ex-boyfriend is spying on your device

When it comes to detecting and removing spyware, the best way to ensure your device is clean is with a trusted spyware detection tool like Clario Anti Spy. This is because some spy apps hide their icon and bury themselves deep in your files, so they’re almost undetectable—especially with a routine system check.

Follow these steps to detect spyware with Clario Anti Spy’s Deep Spyware Scan:

1. Download Clario Anti Spy on your desktop and get a subscription to create an account.  

2. Connect your phone to the laptop via cable.
3. Press Mobile scan, then Scan my phone.
4. If found, follow the step-by-step on-screen instructions to remove any spyware traces and secure your device.

4. Be careful when using social media

Sometimes, exes create new accounts to stalk their former partners on social media. They could track your friends, likes, and updates. They can piece together enough info to guess your location and even infer who you’re currently dating, based on your interactions.

It’s important you mind what you put up on your social accounts. You don’t know who’s watching.

Follow these tips to minimize your online footprint:

• Stop jumping on trends that make you drop personal info or your location.
• Go through your friends or followers list and remove anyone who seems suspicious or is connected to your ex.
• Turn off location sharing on all platforms (especially Snapchat) to prevent tracking.
• Limit your posts—avoid sharing details about your daily routines, plans, or relationships.
• Limit who can see your posts, likes, and profile.

If you still feel like someone’s watching you, make your account private, remove all suspicious followers, or, in more severe cases, deactivate your account and open a new one.

5. Check your car and belongings for suspicious devices

It’s not uncommon for an ex to place a camera, recorder, or GPS tracker in your car or personal items. They could use regular devices like the Tile Mate, SpyTec GPS GL300, or even Apple AirTags to track your movements without your knowledge.

You should search for any of these hidden devices, and here’s how you do it:

1. Check inside and outside your car for hidden devices. Some common places include:
   • Under the hood
   • Wheel wells
   • Inside the bumpers
   • Under the seats
   • In compartments
   • Dashboard
   • Vents
   • Mirrors
2. Carefully check the lining and corners of your clothes, shoes, and jewelry.
3. Listen for unusual sounds or flashing lights in the dark.
4. You can even use a GPS detector or bug sweeper, to be doubly sure.

If you’ve received any items from your spying ex during or after your relationship, do check them for cameras or microphones. Better still, throw them away if you can.

6. Search your home for hidden cameras and microphones

If you suspect someone’s spying on you, then you should check your home for hidden cameras and microphones, too. They’re usually tucked away in ordinary places, but here’s how you can look for them:

• Check everyday items like smoke detectors, clocks, stuffed animals, air vents, sockets, and picture frames—these are common hiding spots.
• Inspect electronics like lamps and speakers. They can be altered to hide small microphones or cameras.
• Turn off the lights and scan the room for tiny red or green lights, which could mean a hidden camera.
• Use a flashlight to spot camera lenses that reflect light.
• Run a radio frequency detector around the room to pick up hidden signals.
• Listen for buzzing, clicking, or plain static sounds.
• Trace unfamiliar wiring, but be careful. Do not electrocute yourself.

If you find any suspicious equipment, please don't remove it. Instead, contact law enforcement or a surveillance detection professional for help.

7. Contact law enforcement for assistance

Talking to the police might help if you think your ex is spying on you. They provide support and can guide you through legal steps to protect yourself.

To get the most out of this, here’s what you should do:

1. Gather evidence: If possible, try to collect any evidence. This could include:
   • Screenshots of suspicious messages
   • Presence of detected spy apps
   • Photos of any hidden devices you might have found
   • Dates and times of suspicious incidents
2. File a report: Visit your local police station and file a report about the spying. The police will take your statement and launch an investigation.
3. Ask for a restraining order: Depending on the laws of your area and how bad your ex is, you should consider applying for a restraining order against your ex. This legal document helps restrict their ability to contact or approach you.
4. Ask them what steps you should take to protect your privacy.

Rounding up…

You should take control of your privacy and stop any unwanted monitoring once you’ve noticed it. The sooner you act, the more secure you'll feel. Securing your devices and being cautious with your personal information can make a huge difference.

But it’s better to run a scan with an anti-spy tool. Use Clario Anti Spy’s Spyware scan to detect and remove spy apps.

Enjoy your freedom!